It's a process. I don't think I am a true New Yorker yet, but I feel certain I am on my way. Not because I have turned cold, or hard. Just because I am learning about people. There are so many people in the city that I have felt in the past year, that you could never judge a book by its cover and all people should be given the benefit of the doubt.
Now I'm not so sure.
Ok, there are homeless people everywhere. If I have change, I always toss it their way. Sometimes even multiple dollars. Sometimes even meals! Not trying to be self righteous, I have honestly always believed that it's just the right thing to do. I can survive without three dollars, so if that's what I have in my pocket, I dole it out like free after dinner mints.
Two funny stories however, have recently re-shaped the way I views those who I once cared for so much.
1. About two weeks ago, I walk down into my subway stop and there is a new little lady who I have never seen before. She's pregnant, and holding a sign, "Young, pregnant, broke. Baby daddy left me. I just need money for a bus ticket home." Just as I am dropping a quarter into her paper cup, I hear a man yell from the top of the stairs. I turn around to see her friend. Her accomplice! He yells down at her, "I've been callin' you! Why aren't you answerin' yo cell girl?! Let's go home!"
She jumps up. Concealed under her blanket was a backpack. She throws her cardboard sign, cup of change, and blanket into the knapsack and pulls out her pink bejewelled cell. "Oh I don't have service down here!! Sorry boo!"
Is this real life?
And 2. Sweet Allie Ficken is here in NYC with her momma and she is auditioning for musical theater roles. The three of us went to dinner last night. I had a huge pizza, so there was a slice left for me to take home. I have been taking my lunch to work everyday because I'm so broke, so I couldn't leave it at the restaurant. It was too perfect a lunch portion!
As we stroll down the sidewalk, there is a man on the sidewalk. He smells and doesn't have a coat. Its a really cold night. He asks for money, "A quarter? A dollar? A nickel? A dime?" I look into his eyes. In my mind I am questioning if I can even think of parting with my gourmet pizza. I offer it to him, only because I don't have any cash.
He replies, "Ohh no. I don't do 'dairy' ".
WTF. I mean really, who are these people?